We don’t talk about that at church…do we?

During a conversation with a friend recently, we got to talking about how young people learn about healthy relationships. Where do they get their information?

There are plenty of websites…plenty of stories…plenty of people who want to give them information. But some of that is not healthy, and some of it is just downright wrong.

I grew up as part of a generation in which we just didn’t talk much about relationships…or sex. In a lot of ways it was just assumed that we would absorb what we needed to know. Some of us did…a lot of us didn’t!

So fast forward to today. There is so much information–and misinformation–available. And young people have so many questions, even if they don’t always know how to frame them.

Those of us who believe that we are created in the sacred image–and that the Creator said that all creation is good–have a responsibility for providing a safe place for questioning…a place where young people can ask difficult questions and receive honest answers. We need to help them understand the reasoning behind what they may see simply as “rules” that keep them from doing what they want–to share how they help create healthy, long-term, committed relationships that will be good for them individually as well as good for society.

Is this going to be easy? Absolutely not! For many of us, we never thought we would be needing to have these kinds of discussions. We may find them somewhat embarrassing. We may be the focus of anger when we talk about boundaries. We may not know all the answers–and that’s all okay.

But we need to listen…and we need to talk about this at church, because church should be a safe place to talk about these topics. If we don’t, someone else will take our place…and we may not like the results.

Are we upside down?

I’ve been kind of quiet the last several days because–quite honestly–I’m just not sure what to say any more. I find myself wondering if the world has really turned upside down…

I grew up with a belief that integrity was important, that telling the truth was an important part of what made a person trustworthy. And yet…I’m still struggling with Aaron Rodgers’ lie about his vaccination status–and the fact that he still doesn’t think he lied. I’m shocked that a lawyer who made a blatant racist comment in a courtroom thought that he was apologizing by saying that he understood some of his words might have been insensitive–and he was sorry if anyone was inadvertently offended. And the former president–and so many of his followers–are still peddling the lie that the election was stolen from him.

I believed that part of our responsibility was to care for one another. Yet as we are still struggling with Covid, many are refusing to wear masks to protect the vulnerable…and many have also indicated that they have no intention of getting vaccinated or getting their children vaccinated to help us get a handle on this horrible pandemic.

I am a follower of Jesus–and my understanding of what that means now (and as I was growing up) was that we were to be stewards of creation. Climate change is real and is changing our world, and yet many refuse to believe it or are willing to make any changes. It is almost too late.

As a follower of Jesus, I grew up hearing his words calling us to care for the refugee…and I watch the news, seeing water cannons being used on people trying to find ways to a better life. I see people being turned back, sent back into hopeless and dangerous situations with no realistic hope of a future for their children. And I see refugees who have been accepted into my country being demonized and attacked.

I grew up believing that diversity made us stronger, and yet now I hear an advisor to the former president demanding that we all worship the Divine in the same way…the way he understands the Divine. I believe that none of us have a complete understanding of who the Divine is–and being willing to share worship experiences with others who have different understandings helps us all grow.

Education has always been important to me. Part of education encourages us to ask questions…to be challenged…to sometimes be uncomfortable. Yet I see librarians under attack for books on the shelf that make some people uneasy, that challenge long-held understandings. I hear people demanding that only one version of history be taught–the history of the victors, not the history of those who have been subjugated and exploited.

What has happened to us?!? The world I grew up in…the expectations about our relationships with each other…all this has been turned upside down. There are some elements of that long-ago world that deserve that, but not everything.

I’ve wondered what I can do to help right the world. Sometimes it feels like it would be so easy to just curl up in a ball and ignore everything else–but I can’t do that. If I do, I enable those that are so determined to keep the world upside down–and I think there is still a lot to salvage! I just can’t give up hope.